The Boy Who Could have been, but not really
by RaiseYourDongerz
Summary: Wetham wants to be a priest, but can he really?
1. Chapter 1

*Komid Wetham has been asked to come to the chancery of the Harlotte Diocese. Per usual, he has gone up to the third floor to meet with Father Gober.*

Komid: Fr. Gober, so wonderful to see you again

Gober: Komid, please come right on in. You have a very important final meeting

Komid: With whom, may I ask

*Fr. Gober does not answer, but leads the young man to a gold door*

Gober: This is it Wetham.

*The arbitrary language of the big G leaves questions, but Komid opens the door anyway. Gober disappears as Komid enters the dark room*

Komid: Hello? Is anyone in here?

*Suddenly a single dim light turns on. The face of a bishop is illuminated at the end of a very long table*

Bishop: Please sit down

*Wetham does as instructed*

Komid: What am I in here for?

Bishop: I just wanted a word with you. You are about to become **the face** of the diocese.

Komid: I'm sorry, I don't understand?

Bishop: It's all very simple Mr. Wetham. We need some sort of proof that our Catholic Schools are developing some vocations to the priesthood. That's why we've chosen you. That's the **only** reason we have chosen you. Our financial benefactors have told us they won't support us unless we have a Catholic School student in our seminary!

Wetham: But what about Britt! He's in seminary.

Bishop: But he didn't just graduate.

Wetham: But what does this mean? Am I still going to be a priest?

Bishop: Oh Wetham! You are never going to be a priest! I have personally assured this. You are the last person we want to be a priest. Don't worry, you'll get an "education," but a priest! HA HA HA, no.

Wetham: Okay.

The end.


	2. Chapter 2

*The scene is the hallway of a High School. It's the middle of the day. Few people are in the hallways. The only sounds heard are the footsteps of a band director, a **very angry** band director. For an entire school year, Michael and Komid have been missing a quarter of the band class on Fridays to do something the band director is unfamiliar with and does not care to become familiar with, Holy Benediction. Now, forced by the clear defiance of these boys, he storms into the chaplain's office to reconcile with the source of his problems*

BD: *Furiously knocks on closed door which immediately opens on contact. Inside, is the priest sitting with the back of the chair to the door.*

BD: Fr. K I need you to tell these two students of mine to come to band class instead of serving benediction!

?: Which boys would that be?

*The voice is not that of Fr. K*

BD: I'm sorry who are you? Are you that other chaplain?

?: Fr. B? No, but I do know him.

BD: Are you even a priest?

?: Of course I am, now answer my question, which two boys?

BD: Michael Middletoe and Komid Wetham. They are trumpet players in the band who constantly...

?: Yes, I am very familiar with _those_ two.

BD: Well look, I know that Komid is about to go into seminary, but...

?: Seminary? THE PRIESTHOOD? OHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA

*The chair spins around to reveal none other than the Bishop himself*

B: Komid isn't going into seminary! I would never even consider making him a priest!

BD: WHO ARE YOU?

B: I'm the bishop! I OWN YOU!

BD: Look, I couldn't care less if Komid went no where after this year! I just need him to be in my class.

B: That won't be necessary.

BD: But you just said you would never make him a priest.

B: It is true that I wouldn't. But I never even spoke about your fate!

BD: Look, maybe I should go back to the band room.

B: No no no no no no no! You are never going back to the band room. You're going to become a priest!

BD: I'm not even Catholic!

B: It's too late. I just made you a priest when your back was turned!

BD: I never had my back turned..

B: Say, is that new grant money going to the band program that I see in the hallway?

*The band director turns around and the bishop ordains him a priest.*

B: You're under my control now! There's no turning back!

BD: Bu bu bu bu bu bu bu..

B: No buts! HAHAHAHA I LOVE MY JOB!

The end


End file.
